Choosing the perfect...... wedding venue

The other day, a friend asked me which wedding venue I’d recommend in their local area.

As a wedding planner, I am familiar with quite a few venues and it’s really easy to just list all the beautiful ones that look good and have capacity for the number of guests you are inviting. But for me, the perfect wedding venue has to have so much more.

You might have an idea in your mind that you want to get married in a particular style of venue. You might like the idea of a barn reception, or saying ‘I do’ in a Highland castle for example. Maybe you’ve got your eye on an English country manor house. But take it from me, there’s more to choosing the right venue than just looking at the bricks and mortar.

The Bingham Hotel, Richmond, Surrey

http://www.helenjonesphotography.co.uk/

For me, it’s mostly about the people.

Everyone you come into contact with at the venue will be critical to your enjoyment of the day, so it’s really important to choose one with exceptional customer service.

Depending on the size of venue, you will often come across several of the venue’s staff. Larger venues have sales staff that show you round, talk you through the benefits of a wedding at their venue and eventually take your booking. Different staff from the operational team will then manage your wedding day. Smaller venues are likely to have one or two people who cover off both these areas.

My advice would be to spend some time at the venue beforehand to get a real feel for the people. If you are thinking about having a civil ceremony and reception at a hotel for instance, book a meal or an overnight stay well in advance so that you can sample the customer service for yourself.

Is the receptionist courteous? If you’ve been for a visit once or twice, do they recognise you and welcome you personally? How is the service at dinner? Was the food inspirational and well prepared? Do the staff smile and look happy? All these things will impact on your day.

Bisham Abbey in Buckinghamshire

http://www.lordandleverett.com/

I’ve been married for nearly a decade now. My husband and I return to our wedding venue every year. Why? Well, the staff at the hotel were true professionals in the run up to our big day and were nothing but outstanding on the day itself. We remember their amazing hospitality and I can hand-on-heart say that they have been consistently outstanding every year since.

If ‘customer service’ features highly on your list too, you might be interested to know that in the coming months I will be revealing some of my favourite wedding venues that tick this all important box.

Sing your heart out

I asked my favourite music expert Susan Heaton-Wright http://www.vivalivemusic.co.uk/
to look at how brides can take elements of the Royal Wedding and make them their own.  One aspect that would be interesting to recreate is the choir.

The choir at the Royal Wedding was simply outstanding. They are one of the best choirs in the world and the sound they created was perfect for the Abbey. They led the hymn singing; sang anthems during the service, including during the signing of the register, and performed the astonishing “I was Glad” by Parry, as Catherine walked down the aisle.

Some churches do have a choir and they will be used to singing popular hymns and anthems for weddings. If you've booked a church it is worthwhile listening to the choir at a service, to see if you like the sound of them.

An alternative might be to either book a professional quartet of singers, who would lead the singing and anthems as required, or to book the services of a local amateur choir.

One note about an amateur choir; they are doing this for pleasure, but there are costs involved for them such as rehearsal time, the time of the conductor (who is normally a professional musician), hiring the music and the rehearsal room and arranging the singers to come to the wedding. I normally recommend that you make a donation to the choir of £200 - £300 to cover their expenses and time.

There are plenty of beautiful choir anthems that could be included such as:

• Jesu Joy of Man’s Desiring:  Bach
• Lead Me Lord : Wesley
• The Lord is my Shepherd: Various * many choirs will have the ‘Vicar of Dibley’s’ version by Howard Goodall
• Hallelujah Chorus:  Handel
• If ye love me: T Tallis
• Cantique de Jean Racine: Faure

The choir will also lead the hymn singing for the congregation. Just think how relieved all your guests will be!

Wedding Transport ideas

If you are getting married in a church and your reception venue is miles away, it can be a headache to ask guests to make the long drive.  Will it break up the flow of the day?  What if they get lost? Will there be enough parking?  But worry not, there are loads of things you can do to ensure the journey is as fun, and easy for guests as possible.

One idea to ensure that your guests arrive relaxed and happy at the reception venue is to hire transport to take them all from the church to the reception venue. That way, they can all travel together knowing that everything is taken care of and that they don’t need to worry about parking or finding the venue by themselves. You can also ensure that they all arrive at the same time. You could consider a vintage bus, or a perhaps a luxury modern coach.

If your church and reception venue are beside water, you could consider a hiring a boat as a really fun treat for your guests.

To make a 40 minute journey seem like just 5, you could consider having some kind of activity or entertainment on board. You might like to devise a quiz about the bride and groom that your guests can take part in. Or maybe you could set them a challenge of spotting key landmarks on the way. When they arrive at their destination, you might consider some organised entertainment to greet guests as they disembark and are waiting for other guests to get off the bus. A singer, a mix and mingle magician or a caricaturist would be the perfect welcome to your venue.

Paige and Harish's vintage wedding at The Bingham, Richmond

It was a complete treat to be invited to work with Paige and Harish on their wedding at the fabulous Bingham Hotel in Richmond.  Wonderful riverside location, wonderful ideas, completely wonderful couple. 

Paige, originally from New Jersey, USA and Harish met at St Andrews university just over 6 years ago, when Paige popped a valentines card under Harish's door. Brave move, and it clearly bowled him over! 

Their guests flew in from all over the globe and were treated to the amazing Bingham hospitality.  They could not have had a more perfect day for their celebrations as temperatures soared to an unseasonal 26 degrees on Easter Sunday.

I've been excited to see their photos - mainly because they incorporated so many really interesting details - a wedding planner's dream.  Take a look.

Wedding planner - Clare Beckwith Weddings http://www.clarebeckwithweddings.co.uk/
Photographer - Helen Jones photography http://www.helenjonesphotography.co.uk/
Brides's dress - J Crew (USA)
Bride's sash - Marisa (USA - handmade in New Jersey, where bride is from)
Bridesmaids dresses - David's Bridal (USA)
Bride's shoes - New Look
Groom's suit and groomsmen's waistcoats/cravats - Moss Bros
Flowers - Conservatory Florist, Richmond, Surrey
Wedding cake (birdcage) - The Cake Parlour, Wimbledon
Groom's cake and cupcakes with St Andrews crest - The Cake Parlour, Wimbledon
Favour bags - Handmade by groom's mother with fabric bought in USA
'Something borrowed and something old' - Vintage birdcage charm from Ireland (a gift from Paige's bridesmaid Grace - pinned to bouquet)
'Something blue' - Ribbon monogrammed with bride's initials and date of wedding - J Crew (pinned to bouquet)
'Something new' - Bride's necklace - Baccarat
Invitations and placecards - Vera Wang
Orders of Ceremony, table numers and seating plan - Ruth Springer Design
Frame for seating plan - Not on the High Street
Tall Birdcages - Wedding Day Hire
Double sided picture frames - John Lewis
Oversize Balloons - Signature balloons

Ivory lace for balloons - John Lewis

Ivory satin ribbon - The Ribbon Company

A lakeside wedding venue with character

We were recently approached by the owners of Bellows Mill to take on the role of Wedding Co-ordinator at their beautiful wedding venue which is perfectly situated for Buckinghamshire, Hertfordshire and Bedfordshire brides.

Bellows Mill is an idyllic old watermill nestling beneath the Chiltern hills and is a really stunning location for an English country wedding.  It has an attractively converted barn which can accommodate up to 60 people for a civil ceremony, and for larger weddings of up to 120 people, there's a marquee which sits beside a pretty lake.  The beautiful and extensive grounds provide the most perfect photographic opportunities.

We love this venue because with no staff, no fixed menus and no set ideas, you can build your wedding from scratch and shape the day you really want - with my expert guidance of course.  What could be more perfect than that?

If you would like to see it for yourself, or to check on availability, please give me a call on 01296 663 726 and together we can start to make your wedding dreams a reality.

Who will be at your side when you walk down the aisle?

In the latest issue of An Essex Wedding (Jan/ Feb 2011), we were asked by a bride whether she could have both her real dad and her step dad at her side when she walked down the aisle. 

Here is our advice:

Q:  My parents divorced when I was five and I have always been closer to my stepfather than my biological dad.  However, while I would prefer to have my stepdad walk me down the aisle, I feel as though this would break my real dad's heart.  Is there any way I can have them both at my side or should I ask my mum to walk me down the aisle instead?

Clare Beckwith Weddings:  It's common for brides and grooms to try and make everyone happy on their big day, but I'm a firm believer in having the wedding that you truly want, rather than trying to please everyone else - even if that means parting with tradition.  Therefore, if you would like both of your dads to walk you down the aisle and they're happy to do so, there's no legal reason why this can't happen. 

Why not have a chat to your registrar or religious minister to see what the possibilities are?  It all depends on the type of ceremony you're having and where you are having it, as every district has its own set of rules. 

However, if having both fathers walk you down the aisle isn't possible, perhaps it would be wise to ask your mum to step in and give each dad another important role in your day instead.

A White Wedding...Dreamy backdrop or a planning nightmare?

It’s been snowing quite heavily here at Clare Beckwith Weddings HQ for a quite few days, but last Saturday we did venture out to a wedding at the 5 * Hanbury Manor where we have been invited to help out as Wedding Concierge.

With the forecasters predicting snow, we packed the car full of sensible essentials (spade, food, water, high vis. jacket etc) plus lots of warm clothing, and set out early.

It started to snow heavily after we arrived and the snowy backdrop of the Garden Court was picture perfect. It was everything you could ever dream of for a white wedding.

But white weddings can cause havoc with your plans too, as we were about to witness when the live 5 piece band call in to say they couldn’t make it, and the photographer turned up red faced and hassled, half way through the ceremony.

It wasn’t a wedding that we had designed and organised ourselves, so all we could do was watch and learn.

As a wedding planning business, we always think ahead and put contingency plans in place, and if you are organising your wedding yourself you should too. It’s essential, even on a normal weather day!

We’ve spoken to a few of our wonderful suppliers to help compile these 10 top tips to help you think of everything if you are facing a snowy, crisp weather wedding.

1) In the planning process, make sure you get good wedding insurance and have a written contract with all your suppliers containing a cancellation clause.

2) A few days before your big day, watch the weather. Yes, boring we know and much like watching paint dry, but very necessary if you want to avoid nasty surprises. Try http://www.accuweather.com/

3) As soon as you hear of weather warnings, contact your suppliers to alert them, and to see what their travel/contingency plans are.

4) If snow is forecasted, encourage suppliers to drive up the day before and stay in a B&B.

5) Make sure all suppliers know where they are going and what time they need to be there for. Provide maps and rough estimates of drive times between venues. It might seem like spoon feeding, but some people aren’t as sensible as you!

6) If you are planning a winter wedding, try to hold it all in one place, or within a very short distance from ceremony to reception venues. Make sure staff are prepared for the winter conditions and that guests are kept happy and not standing around in the cold.

7) If you are booking a live band, try to do so through a reputable agent. Try http://www.vivalivemusic.co.uk/
They only have musicians and bands that have been interviewed and auditioned. The musicians are trustworthy and won’t let down clients. In the unlikely event that someone is ill in the band, they will organise other musicians – giving you additional peace of mind.

8) If you are let down by any of your suppliers, check with your venue. They should have a list of local suppliers that could be contacted in an emergency. Alternatively, they might have other musicians on-site for residencies or other events that might be able to provide some entertainment – even if it wasn’t what was originally planned.

9) Contact suppliers via local business websites that might be able to assist. Even if they can’t, they might know someone that can. You would be surprised how everyone helps in a crisis!

10) If you find yourselves without a photographer, ask one of your guests with a decent camera to stand in for a bit until they arrive. You might even discover a hidden talent!

And to keep everyone comfortable and warm...

1) Make guests aware of the conditions so that they can dress appropriately, wearing suitable footwear, coats etc. Read my last blog post by Isobel Kershaw for some stylish ideas!

2) Prime your ushers to help push cars in the snow and also make them aware they may have to remove snow in places for guests to get to the church. Give them spades to do the job!

3) Serve warm mulled cider in the church to keep guests warm and happy!

4) If you are having a church ceremony, give out hand and foot warmers to guests with their order of service. Churches often have no heating and are cold at the best of times.

5) At the reception venue, ask your photographer to set up lights in an allocated room to do all the formal family shots which will keep guests in the warm.

6) Lay out a red carpet laid for the bride to walk on in places where it is particularly snowy or icy.

Winter weddings are wonderful. Don’t let the snow put you off. Just be prepared!

Our sincere thanks go to the amazing Lord and Leverett http://www.lordandleverett.com/ and to Viva Live music http://www.vivalivemusic.co.uk/ for their contributions to this blog post.
Photo credit:  http://www.marriott.co.uk/

Are you a guest at a Winter wedding?

OMG - it's just 2 degrees outside at the moment - a comparatively warm mini-break from the really, really cold snap of the past few weeks.  The weather forecasters are telling us to prepare for another an arctic blast this week. That’s fine if your winter weekends are pretty free and you can embrace the snow and go sledging, but what do you do if you are invited to a wedding and want to look stylish?

To help you with your winter wedding style woes, I have done what I always do when I need style advice, and called the very lovely and incredibly stylish Isobel Kershaw from the NHJ Style Consultancy. She has these words to stop the onset of style panic...

Isobel says...
“The great thing about a winter wedding is that you don’t rely on the weather and can therefore dress to accommodate it, knowing that it will be cold!

And so with this in mind, here are a few inspiring looks to help you on your way to choosing a stylish outfit as a guest of a winter wedding.

A Church Wedding

Church weddings will be cold and you know that you will be travelling from the church to a reception venue, so how do you dress up warm, but still look like you are at a wedding as opposed to on a skiing holiday?

Fur!

It’s big this season, and fake fur has never looked better.

This faux fur from FCUK will ensure you will stand out in the crowd and it will certainly keep you warm!

Or go for drama with this vibrant red faux fur jacket from M&S.

If you are not into the all over fur look, there are some great coats on the High Street which have fur trims to give that glamorous edge to any outerwear.

The other alternative for a bang on trend winter coat which is dressy enough to go to any event – is the cape! There are lots on the High Street including this one from Reiss with the military shoulder detail.

So with the outerwear sorted, what goes underneath? Here are a few dresses for different body shapes to inspire you.

For the Rhubarb shape, we have a stunning print dress from Karen Millen with long sleeves to keep you warm whilst looking very stylish.

Accessorise with statement earrings colourful opaque tights (red) and platform heels.

For the hourglass, we have a curvy and very sexy dress from LK Bennett.

This is a very versatile dress that can be used after and with the right accessories can be glammed up for a winter wedding. Add a skinny patent belt and sparkly cuff to ensure that you will turn heads! And to add to the appeal, it has been reduced from £195 to £115.

So for all you lovely pears out there, here is the dress for you.

A fabulous navy lace (again so on trend) dress from Whistles. Another feminine dress with sleeves which is so important in the winter. To style it up, I would change the belt for one of a contrast colour in red or cream or even a metallic to make it look more party.

Also accessorise it with colourful tights in orange or a more subdued purple.

And now for the Apples, let me entice you will a dress that will flatter and make you feel gorgeous.



This pretty print dress from Phase Eight will certainly brighten your day with its colourful flower print and is a very flattering with an empire line shape. This dress also doesn’t need too much accessorising as it makes a statement with its print and colour.

And so to finish off with a few more accessory ideas to ensure you individualise your look.

The hat – Many of you may think about wearing the classic style hat for a wedding whether it is winter or summer, but think outside the box and again think fur!

The Cossack hat from Debenhams at £18 will bring a bit of edge to your outfit, but sometimes you need to be brave to carry off such a hat!

Gloves will be needed and if you are wearing the cape, you will need long ones!

These long red gloves from Hobbs will really make a statement and are certainly a nice change from black!

At £69 though, you had better make sure you don’t lose them!

So if you have a winter wedding to prepare for, you may now be a little more inspired by what you are going to choose to wear and with lots of reductions already happening in the shops, you can splash out on a few extra accessories.”

Having an outdoor ceremony?

...then take a look at our advice in this month's issue of An Essex Wedding (page 94).

Their reader said:  "I have my heart set on an outdoor ceremony next summer, but I'm conscious that the British weather can be very unreliable.  What's the best way to prepare for the grisly conditions?"

We said:  "It’s lovely that you are planning an outdoor ceremony – it’s such a romantic idea and will save on venue decorations, as you’ll have the natural beauty of your surroundings to wow guests!


And don’t worry; there are quite a few things that you can put into place to put your mind at rest on the day, so that you can relax whatever the British weather brings! Here are some of our ideas...

• Choose a venue that offers an alternative indoor space if the weather makes a turn for the worse. Braxted Park in Essex is a great example. You can hold your wedding outside in the beautifully restored Knott Garden, and they also keep the Orangery free for your use in case of unexpected downpours! http://www.braxtedpark.co.uk/

• Consider having some sort of cover like an open-sided canopy where your guests can sit out of the rain. Mangapp Manor in Essex provides just the thing, with the opportunity for you to marry in an African thatched gazebo, floating on water. Your guests are seated on the lakeside, under cover if required. http://www.mangappmanor.co.uk/

• Make sure that you tell your guests that the wedding will be held outside so that they can dress appropriately. If there is a drizzle, leave a selection of pretty umbrellas for your guests to huddle under. My personal favourites are the ones by Lisbeth Dahl.

• The outdoor surroundings can sometimes also drown out the sound of you making your wedding vows, especially if the rain is coming down too, so consider hiring in a sound system for you and your groom. Your DJ or band should be able to organise this for you.

• With rain often comes a drop in temperature, so why not consider leaving cosy blankets on everyone’s chair. That way, guests won’t be left in the cold should the rain come down! You could also consider using portable heaters and have warm drinks ready for your guests after the ceremony.

• If all else fails, use the weather as an excuse to acquire more pretty wedding accessories. Embrace the rain with a pair of wellies! I love the ones by Weddington Boots (http://www.weddingtonboots.com/). They can even be customised with diamante, feathers and ribbons!"

Say it with 'Love Letters'

Here is a great idea that we came across today – especially if you want to give your wedding day a completely personal touch. They are beautiful bespoke wooden letters from a lovely company in Dorset called Jonny’s Sister http://www.jonnyssister.co.uk/

The letters can be made in any size and come unpainted so that you can tie them into your own colour scheme.

We also love their large wooden letters and can think of endless ways to use them. You could use them to decorate your gift table for instance – using the words ‘Mr & Mrs’. Or you could have words like ‘Love’ or ‘Cherish’ around the venue.

Their hand carved Little Wooden Letters are cute too.  They are just 6 centimetres tall and come with a white satin ribbon. You could use them around your napkins to decorate your place settings!

They also do bunting – isn’t this a fun idea for a proposal!

As well as the colours they show on their website, the bunting can also be made up in any colour scheme provided they have fabric in that colour. We also understand that they are happy for customers to send in their own fabric for them to use. How’s that for fantastic customer service!

Heavenly Hanbury

Hanbury Manor in Hertfordshire is very special to us as one of our first brides, Nila, chose Hanbury's beautiful Garden Court to host her wedding.  A few years on, we are really pleased to let you know that Clare Beckwith Weddings has been invited to be one of their preferred suppliers.

It's an opulent 5 star venue with a choice of banqueting rooms to suit weddings, big or small. Poles Hall, the original chapel belonging to the Manor House is one of our favourites. It's got bags of character, high ceilings and a minstrel gallery.

For a summer wedding, Garden Court is the perfect setting. We particularly love its walled gardens and beautifully manicured lawns.

Credits:  http://www.expression-photography.co.uk/

The Art of a Good Marriage

On old school friend asked me to read this at her wedding...It's The Art of a Good Marriage, by Wilferd A. Peterson.

It's simple, but oh so true!


"A good marriage must be created.
In the art of marriage the little things are the big things...

It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once each day.

It is never going to sleep angry.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.

It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.

It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is finding room for the things of the spirit.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not only marrying the right partner...
It is being the right partner."